January 2011
I want things to go well
December 2010
I can barely put my thoughts together to say something about 2010, so coming out of this year I’m going to say all I gained was experience.
I have nothing to say anymore
a song that makes me want to ram my head into a wall breaking every bone in my neck hopefully leading to a slow, painful death: I Will Follow You Into the Dark by Death Cab for Cutie
I really hate myself most of the time
I miss having 4 solid bestfriends.
I have 2 now.
I miss you guys more than anything.
what I honestly want to do
-continue to get good grades, as lame as it may seem to some that is very important to me
-stop eating, start running again, I want to be happy with my body for once because I have no idea what that feels like
-continue writing and drawing, teach myself how to play guitar better and be able to sing at the same time
-become less bitter
I am the son and the heir of a shyness that is criminally vulgar I am the son and heir of nothing in particular
we’ve come too far to have to give it all up now we live lives that are rich and blessed and we burn for how we transgress
I feel awful bullshitting this letter.
there’s nothing wrong, but I will never be happy
square going nowhere: Selena, →
zhelseaconatwo:
I was cleaning my room and found the christmas and birthday cards you made me, tucked nice and neatly into the back of my drawer. the only thing I’ve ever tucked neatly in my life. I’ve missed you a lot lately. I’ve worn the bracelet that came with the Christmas card every day since you mailed it…
awe chelsea… ;_; I miss you so much, we’ll make plans for next...
why can’t I just let it go
once I think I have it creeps back into my thoughts
give me something to work for
I HAVE CLEARLY LOST ALL SOCIAL SKILLS…
Ah, whenever I listen to The Smiths it just reminds me of summer so much and installs this really weird feeling
you know that you are not alone, I need you like water in my lungs.
You really know how to push me away, don’t you.